It's official ... I am the world's most clueless mother!

Nathan's got a great idea. He wants LarryBoy to have a posse of superhero pals called the Veggie Friends ... you know, like Batman is part of the Super Friends group. He's been talking about all these ideas for Veggie Tale inspired superheroes, and drawing up sketches of what they look like and plotting out stories to be made into LarryBoy and the Veggie Friends dvd's. I'm impressed ... after all, Nathan's only 6 years old.

This evening, Nathan was talking to Joel and me about all the Veggie Friend ideas he had: some of the characters were The Green Asparagus (which is sort of like the Green Lantern and could be played by Alfred the Asparagus), Aqua Gourd (which is a spoof of Aquaman and would be the perfect role for Jimmy Gourd ... or Jerry Gourd, cause it is sorta hard to tell the difference), Wonder Carrot (instead of Wonder Woman, and Laura Carrot would be a good one for this role), and Grape Guy (which would be acted out by Pa Grape). He was even telling us how in their first episode the Veggie Friends have to capture the Milk Money Bandit (who is a French pea who has escaped from prison). It was a really exciting adventure and we were all caught up in the retelling of it as Nathan was giving us a dramatic rendition.

During the conversation, I couldn't help but feel that there was something was missing from the Veggie Friends group. After several minutes, it became quite obvious to me that what was needed was for a tomato to somehow be worked in to the Veggie Friends. I mean, could you possibly have the Veggie Friends without Bob the Tomato?! Why, it would be akin to trying to have Sesame Street without Ernie!

So, in my utter cluelessness, I dared to suggest to my son that maybe the Veggie Friends might ought to include a "Bat Bob."

There was an incredibly long moment of stunned silence. The silence was followed by a couple of big, low sighs from both boys.

Then Nathan took a deep breath and said, "I don't think that Bat Bob would work out, Mom. He's just not the kind of superhero I had in mind for Veggie Friends."

Me (again in my totally clueless and unhip mom mode): "Why not? I think Bat Bob is kind of cute."

Boy, was that the wrong thing to say! With those words, I hit a new low of cluelessness.

Joel: "Well, that's just it. Bat Bob is cute. Veggie Friends aren't cute."

Me (in a rather limp voice): "Oh."

Nathan: "Besides, the costume is sort of too big for Bob."

Okay, now that struck me as incredibly funny. So I laughed ... it was just a little laugh, but still a laugh none-the-less. Again, this was the absolute wrong response for any hip and understanding mother to have in a moment such as this.

Two sets of eyes gave me a look ... a look that said, "We weren't intending for that to be funny."

So I stopped mid-laugh and said, "Um ... well ... uh ... Couldn't you just size the costume down a little so that it fit Bob better? I mean, it's just a matter of drawing it to fit on his body, right?"

Again there was silence. Long silence. The boys exchanged looks that seemed to say, "Have you ever seen anyone so clueless? This is really unbelievable that someone could actually be this dumb!"

Then Joel says, "You can't just size down the costume, Momma. It's just the size that it is. And it doesn't fit on Bob. Nathan's tried it. Trust us ... Bat Bob won't work out."

Nathan: "Yeah, Mom. Besides, even if the costume did fit, it still wouldn't work out. Bob's just not superhero material. Sorry, but Bat Bob is no good."

You know, for the first time, it appears that I'm a totally clueless mom. I'm still in shock over my sons' rejection of Bat Bob. Bob the Tomato ... not superhero material?! Why, I thought he would be the superest hero of them all! I guess that just goes to show you how clueless of a mother I really am.

Hopefully, I'm not too clueless on the big things that really matter in this life. (Not that superheros aren't important and all!) Trying to raise boys is a tough thing for this mother. I've never been a boy, and quite honestly, there is a lot of boy stuff I just don't get. In fact, superheros are the least of them! But every morning and every night I pray for God's grace to provide me with an unnatural wisdom for relating to my sweet guys, and in the meantime I'm trust that the Lord will continue to cover over all of my cluelessness.

Boys! I'm sure glad that God gave me my two ... even if by raising them I continue to prove just how utterly clueless I really am.